Why go for the married chick?  Not that I’m against it… is it the challenge???

Dear Fan,

It’s simple really.  Single women aren’t dissatisfied with their husbands because they don’t have husbands.  Single women still don’t know the reality of men and marriage.  They’re still out there looking for Mr. Frosted Spiky Hair with the great abs, tan skin, nice car, good job, and oh yeah… “he has to have a really great sense of humor and make me laugh”.

*KNOCK KNOCK* Reality calling… that guy doesn’t exist outside of your television.

Married women have actually figured this out albeit a few years and a few kids too late.  Now they’re stuck in unhappy marriages to guys who aren’t attentive to their needs, guys who cheat, guys who care more about drinking than spending time with their kids, guys who were considered “quite the catch” back in their hey days.  The nice guys, of course, finished last.

So, no, it’s not the challenge of trying to lure a woman away from their spouse.  In fact, it’s quite the opposite.  It’s the women who usually reveal that they are unhappy and feeling emotionally and sexually neglected.  And they gravitate toward men who are willing to listen and pay attention to them.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t prey on unhappily married women.   I just think there’s someone for everyone.  But what if my someone got married already?  Shit, what if my someone lives in Nigeria?  Then I’m really screwed!  The good news is, there are probably multiple someones for everyone, so even if the first someone doesn’t work out, you can still find another someone.  Some people are lucky enough to have multiple someones at the same time.  Me?  I’m not that good.

The bottom line is, I owe it to myself to seek out my own happiness.  As long as I’m not trying to destroy a functioning relationship, and not using someone for sex or money, am I really doing anything wrong? Yeah I guess there’s that whole “thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife” thing but I think the weight of the moral dilemma lies mostly on the woman.  But that’s a whole other story.

There you have it, my complete justification of pursuing a married woman.  I’ll save a seat for you all in hell.