50 Things I Can’t Stand
September 6, 2005, Posted by Eric Schneider at 8:27 am
- Camera phones
- Trucker hats
- People who say they’re into 80′s music just to be trendy.
- Trendy people in general.
- James Spader
- The series 24
- CSI and any spin off of it.
- People who always have to “one up” everyone.
- People who start out every sentence with, “A buddy of mine…”
- The phrases “Yeah butt…” and “I was just…”
- PeOplE wHo TyPe LiKe ThIs
- People who try to finish your sentence.
- People who finish your sentence after you already finished. already finished. (It would sound like that).
- Girls who yell “Whoooooooooooo!”
- Guys who frost their hair.
- Any young white actor or singer who talks like they’re from the streets. How do you go from being in the Mickey Mouse Club to being gangster?
- Dora the Explorer
- “Hit me up.”
- The Boston Red Sox
- People who think they’re unique because they wear black and dye their hair black. Hey! Guess what? You look like everyone else who does that.
- People who own computers but never learn how to use them and then ask me to fix their computers when they fuck them up.
- The same people from the previous item who own nicer computers than I do.
- People who force their politics on you every chance they get.
- Women who want you to provide emotional support and intellectual stimulation while their douche bag boyfriend provides the sexual stimulation.
- Local News
- Unfriendly people.
- People who cheat on their spouse.
- People who only do the minimum.
- People who incorrectly recite lines from movies.
- People who try to pass off a comedian’s jokes as their own.
- Every single entity who contributes to the circulation of spam, junk mail, chain letters, door hangers, email jokes, and any other unsolicited invasion of your privacy.
- Credit card companies.
- Collection agencies.
- Companies who take advantage of young people and the elderly.
- Bad breath (Coffee and cigarette combo is the worst.)
- Women who get the “man haircut” after they get married and have kids.
- Couples who wear the same outfit.
- People who label any type of music as “just a bunch of noise”
- When my cat sits on my keyboard when I’m trying to type.
- People who write viruses and spyware.
- Parents who leave it up to TV and video games to raise their children.
- Parents who don’t watch their kids around water, or let them ride in the back of trucks, or leave them in hot cars while they run into the store.
- People who think sports figures, movie stars, and singers should be role models.
- Terrorists.
- The playboy bunny logo.
- People who talk about carbs.
- People who think the world is coming to an end.
- People who have to get drunk or high to have fun.
- Arizona
- The taste of penis!
Just a question…why do you “hate” James Spader??? He is the only specific person you named.
That’s a good question. I wrote this like 5 years ago, so I’m not really sure what he was doing at the time that made me put him on the list.
I just googled him and realized I just don’t like his smug face. Now that I’m 5 years older, I still don’t like his face, but I don’t think it’s worthy of being on a top 50 list. I may have to replace him with people whose names start with the letter ‘P’ or left-handed ophthalmologists.