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Living With a Ghost

It’s been a little over a week since I’ve been without my cat. I’d be lying if I said I’ve been coping well, but I imagine it’s all a part of the grieving process. I never realized how much impact my cat had on my life; not just emotionally, but physically as well.

I have to keep reminding myself that I don’t have a cat anymore because I still unconsciously move around my apartment as if there were an invisible cat weaving between my feet. When I wake up, I look to see where she’s curled up so I don’t kick her when I swing my feet out of bed. I leave the bathroom door open just a tad so she doesn’t start meowing while I’m in the shower. I open cans of beans very quietly so she can’t hear (I think it’s mean to make her think I’m opening up tuna.) Every time I open a cabinet door, I expect her to run inside. When I leave the apartment, I open the door barely wide enough for me to fit though so she doesn’t sneak out. I look expectantly for her behind the door when I come home. I make sure not to throw my jacket on the bed so she doesn’t cover it with hair. When I first sit down at my desk I lean to one side to give her room to jump up on the chair. When I go to bed, I get into my sleeping position quickly because I only have about 5 seconds before she jumps up on the bed to find her spot.

Now, those five seconds pass, and then there’s nothing. It’s an incredibly lonely feeling.

4 Comments

  1. Anne Marie P.

    Hey Eric,

    sorry to hear about your cat…..my dog is about 11 yrs old and things are starting to go….I can’t imagine how i’ll feel when he’s gone…..

    your site is awesome! just as funny as I remember you:)

    Anne

  2. Sorry to hear that mate. A number of years ago in my former life I lost an 18 year old cat. So I know how difficult it can be. Now I have two dogs, the eldest is going to be 12 this year so I know she won’t be around forever. Really not looking forward to that at all.

  3. Eric Schneider

    Hey look who it is!

    Thanks for making the trip over to my side of the Internet. And thanks for sharing about your pets as well. Give the dogs a pat pat for me.

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